Sunday, July 11, 2010

disrespect

Friday, 15 minutes til closing.  The girls and I are counting down the sweet minutes until our glorious weekend starts.  In walks 2 customers.  Our cashier takes their order.  From the minute they open their mouths, I dislike them already.  Sexual innuendos fly out, dirty humor, filthy jokes and throw in some Spanish cuss words that they think we don't understand.  The two banter for a little while and like a bad skit, they laugh and encourage one other in their coarse exchange.  Of course, our cashier is the subject of their 'flirtatious' joking and she just laughs it off.  She puts in their order and they go to fill up their drinks.  I personally can't wait to see them go.  They complain that their soda tastes flat which happens when the machine isn't getting the ice that it needs.  My cashier climbs up onto the soda machine (the only way to access the ice) to fix it.  They wolf whistle and cat call and joke about her about putting on a show.  Our usually nice mailman who's very sweet joins in their filthy banter. 

How come when some men act like idiots, others think it's okay to participate too?  I shake my head and tell my mailman to stop that nonsense (we're good friends so I can talk to him like that.)  He thinks I'm kidding around so he laughs but eventually takes his seat. 

I'm annoyed and I'm ready for them to go.  I yell at the cook, "Is their order almost ready?!"  She looks at me funny because it's only been a minute or so and I'm not one to rush her.  She's working on it, she tells me.  My cashier finishes the ice and walks over and stands by me. 

"Those guys are world class jerks," she mutters. 
"I know!"  I exclaim!  "I thought it wasn't bothering you, you're laughing about it." 
"No, it does.  I don't understand how guys think they can talk to women like that."  She shakes her head.

I'm thoroughly perplexed.  She was playing it off like it was no big deal.  Some women enjoy that kind of attention, that kind of talk makes them feel attractive or desired.  I thought she might be one of them.  Apparently she didn't feel that way.  Then it hit me, she must be one of people that laughs when they're nervous.  That makes sense.  The two guys continue with their 'jokes' and we try to ignore them.  Their order can't come up fast enough.  I'm really offended at this point.  Their food finally comes up, she bags it, and gives it to them.  We give them a curt goodbye and they're gone. 

Our cook notices how peeved we both are, and asks what happened.  The cashier recounts it all for her, telling her of their disrespect and crude humor.  At this point my blood's boiling. 

Had I known how my cashier really felt and how uncomfortable they were making her, I would have been quicker to come to her defense.  If I could do it all over again, I would have refunded their money, told them I didn't like the way they were talking to us, and given them 5 seconds to get out before I call the police.  Hindsight is 20/20.  If they come back again, I'll be much quicker to react. 

It's one of those situations that I keep replaying in my head, analyzing how and what I should have done better.  It's my job to protect my employees from harassment like that and I didn't.  I've never thrown out a customer before, and I'm a little hesitant to start.  Times like that make me hate being in charge, makes me feel timid.  I wish I had a male around to protect all of us or a bodyguard even.  Potential job opening right there, lol.  Verbal harassment seems less black and white than physical harassment. 

But come Monday, I'll be posting a 'we reserve the right to refuse service' sign and I'll be on guard to use it if I have to. 

1 comment:

  1. Whitney deals with men like this often at the bank. It's one thing for men to speak and talk that way around other men (that doesn't make it right), but it's ridiculous for them to talk that way to women, especially those they don't know.

    A big pet peeve of mine. Grrr.

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