Pregnancy Update and Newsletter

This week marks 28 weeks.  7 months.  I have not finished one pregnancy book.  I'm just doing this by the seat of my pants!  I'm already getting sooo hot.  I'm never cool enough.  Ever.  Our electricity bill is gonna be ridiculous.  I passed my glucose test, yay!  I didn't think I would, that 16 oz Coke made me feel so sick.

For 6 weeks I would wake up at 4 every morning and stay awake for a couple of hours before falling asleep again, that made me a mean pregnant monster.  Luckily that stopped and I have friends again.  I would post more belly pictures but my facebook is being way stupid.  FB and my mac are mad at each other and poor Photo Uploader is the victim of their custody battle.  On to the newsletter!

Dear Selah,

You've been an active little booger and you're moving around a lot.  It's like you're a balloon attached to my sides and I can't move for fear of putting too much pressure on you.  You have made my core (abs, lateral muscles and back) absolutely useless making it impossible to get up off the couch without the help of a forklift.  You've exploded in my belly these last couple of weeks and every time I walk past a mirror I gawk at how big I am.

Your grandma is way excited that you're coming.  She's already bought a playpen/bassinet/changing table for HER house when you come over.  She's also insistent on getting you the BEST mattress that money can buy because it's proven how babies get herniated disks because the unloving parents only bought a $50 mattress.  She also wants to stay with us for a whole MONTH to make sure that mama knows how to take care of you. 

Your daddy and I went to register for all your stuff.  Ms. Debbie was a big help (Hi Debbie!!).  We about fell over with sticker shock.  Your crib will cost $400, your mattress (at least another $200 if your grandma has anything to do with it), not to mention your bedding priced at $180.  Your little 'throne' all together will come out to over $700.  We haven't even gotten into the glider, playpen, travel system, high chair and 50 other things that you'll need.  We've decided that it would be more economical to get you a king size bed complete with bedding that you can spend your life growing into.  You might not get toys like the rest of the kiddos but by gosh, you'll have the best bed ever!  When you get bored, we'll give you matches to play with which you can sell on the street corner to pay off your ultra mattress.  I kid.

You make me very tired and I can't work for very long without resting but that's a very good thing.  I can't wait to work less and stay home with you.  I can't wait to play domestic housewife and add PT- SAHM to my job description (that's stay at home mom for all you ignoramus out there).

Your showers are coming up where people will 'shower' us with gifts.  It's such a blessing to be part of our church.  Selah, I can't wait for you to meet all these awesome people.  They're already buying you clothes and hats, (Hi Sandra L!!!), and they're praying for you and they ask about you every time I see them.  I wonder if you can hear the preaching while you're down in there.  I like to think you'll come out recognizing Jake's voice and it will soothe you.

You're reactive to Daddy's voice and you get all riled up when he gets into theological talks with others.  I pray you will have a deep deep love for Jesus and that he will grant you wisdom in understanding his gospel.  I pray you will understand the depth of your depravity and your abounding need for a Savior.  I pray He saves you and gives you a new heart to replace the one you will be born with.

Sometimes I worry that my 'sin' will be passed down to you.  You know, my worry and anxiety, my temptations. laziness, and wrong attitudes.  Like when I get angry or have lustful thoughts, what does that do to you?  I hope that these things don't affect you while you're in the womb.  I should look into these things and get my theology straight.  Note to self, look up generational sin.

I'm getting excited about your birth.  In fact, we're going to a child-birthing class this Saturday.  Although it scares the FIRE out of me.  I don't know what or how my pain tolerance will be.  Oy, I don't want to talk about that right now.  The good news is, we're NOT hiring a doula.  Why is that good you ask?  Because your daddy and I had a good long fight talk about that.  I wanted one because we've never done this before and everyone knows you need a expert around when I panic and lose it.  But your precious daddy reminded me that he's been there for me all the times that I've panicked and lost it.  And guess what?  He's STILL here.  Your daddy is a soldier who has stuck by mama despite her crazies.  And best of all, he wants to be there for the both of us during your birth and doesn't want anyone else to take his place.  After talking with Bernadette, she said that if he wants to be an active laboring partner then no doula needed.  So there ya go.  When you come into the world it's gonna be your parental units and a couple of midwives. 

We love you Selah.
-Mama

Tomorrow- I'll tell you all about work!

Newsletter Week 21

Dear Selah,

We found out you were a girl about 2 weeks ago.  We're so thrilled about it!  I had a feeling you were a girl all along and am very happy to have those suspicions confirmed.  Several people believed you to be a girl as well so you made your presence known.  Luckily, because you are a girl, we've had your first name picked out for a long time.  Good thing your Daddy and I decided ahead of time because it's gonna take us 4 more months to decide on your middle name!  Your name means, "meditate upon" or "think on this."  Uncle Rusty keeps telling us the meaning of your name is 'unknown' which I guess is true.  No one is exactly positive what it means.  Your name comes from Psalms, spoken in many of them.  Daddy and I love it and know it will be perfect on you.

I read somewhere that when you have children the days go by like years and the years go by like days.  You'll be grown and married before we know it.  I plan on cherishing all my time with you and noting everything and every way you grow.  I've really started to feel your movements inside me and it blesses me immensely. You started this yesterday and you seem to be more active at night.  You don't like Sam's pizza, I know that much, as I experienced yesterday.


I met a mother a work that has a son with a brain defect.  I asked her if it was hard with her son and she told me the honest truth.  It's very hard.  He has many special needs and will probably never walk or even talk normally.  She said it's also a huge blessing to care for him.  I realize the difficulty and reality of caring for someone with special needs, I also understand what a blessing it will be.  We constantly pray for your health as you grow in the womb and hope that you will be perfect and well.  If you're not, we won't be disappointed for God knows best and He allowed you to be that way.  We will cherish you and enjoy taking care of you all the days of your life.

I'm been thinking about how life will change when you are born.  We won't be able to get up and go as we please, life will be more scheduled and regulated to accommodate your needs as you demand consistency and regularity in your life.  This will be a change for us in the beginning.  Your needs will be a great priority and as parents that is a sacrifice, you will come before sleep, before the housekeeping and before our own emotions.  It's a sacrifice we lovingly and willingly make for you.  Our privacy and intimacy will be pushed aside on most days as we make room and time for you.  Lots of changes to come.  In the meantime, while we wait, I will cherish my days with your dad and enjoy your presence inside of me.  Be blessed little babe and come healthy.  May God keep you.

Pregnancy Update

This is week 13 or 14 depending on who you ask (like my doctor).  That's 3 months and 1 or 2 weeks for all you layman. 

I've gained 8 lbs so far and I've had 2 people tell me that I look like I've lost weight, which means it's all repositioning.  No baby bump yet, I just feel fat.  My lower belly is getting bigger and it's pushing down all my jeans.  I can wear my pants unbuttoned but it really only works if I'm wearing a long shirt. 

More nauseated this week than in all my 1st trimester, I don't know why that is.  Dry heaving and gagging more than anything else.  Starting to have trouble breathing.  My midwife tells me that's normal because my body is producing 40% more blood than usual which makes it less oxygen and nutrient rich.  Finally picked a birthing center!  After visiting Bay Area Birthing Center, a midwife and Rite of Passage, I decided on Rite of Passage.  Bernadette Olivier is so great, she's authentic, truly cares about woman and babies and is still very professional.  We feel like it's a very good fit for us. 

I've never been one of those women who go to the bathroom all the time, but now I have to tinkle all the time!  I guess that's good cause I'm supposed to be drinking more water. 

Fatigued and fighting a minor cold but all is well. 

So far, I don't hate being pregnant.  Louis has been great at taking care of me.  Can't agree on a girl's middle name or a boy's name at all!  This baby might be nameless. 

Anywho, for all those who think this is too much information, I'm sorry.  I want to write all this down to document it for my sake.